So I am a bit surprised. When I anticipated this maternity leave I imagined being at home with a sleeping baby and more time on my hands than I would know what to do with. I envisioned little Jillian sitting peacefully in her little bouncy or swing or whatever type of contraption she enjoyed while I sat at the computer to blog, play on facebook, work on my photo books, etc. But somehow the majority of my maternity leave is over (I go back to work in two weeks)and this is the first time I have even thought about blogging. I did get one photo book completed but that was only because I had a shutterfly coupon that expired by a certain date; so I stayed up until 11:30pm the night of it's expiration just to make sure my book was complete and the order was placed. I have spent quite a bit of time on facebook but...don't we all?
I also envisioned using this time to exercise and loose some weight so that when I went back to work everyone would comment on how great I looked after just having a baby. If you could see me now, you would know exactly how that little fantasy played out for me. Let's just say there is a reason I became a member of calorie counter.com just this morning and why I recently placed an order for some diet pills.
Little Jillian truly is a very sweet baby. She smiles a lot. However, she IS a baby and like Jackson, she too seems to be what I like to call a "text-book baby." She does everything the books, magazines, and movies tell you she'll do. She fights sleep to the point of exhaustion, she requires a new diaper about once every hour or so, she is only entertained in one spot for about 20 minutes (ergo my vision of her sitting peacefully for hours while I play on the computer), and then if you throw acid reflux on top of all these typical baby antics you end with a sweet, chunky, little bundle of work. I am convinced that these people who brag about their babies sleeping through the night from day one, or NEVER spitting up, and hardly ever crying are delusional. They are simply people who live life always looking on the bright side. So they PRETEND that everything is perfect and then try to convince everyone else of the same thing. Well I am a VERY honest person; With myself and everyone else. So let me give it to you straight. Babies are HARD, they are difficult little creatures that take your sleep and all your energy.
Adding Jillian to our family has made one thing very clear to me. Mothers from earlier times are truly super women. They are Gods in their own right. How on earth any woman could be happy with a houseful of kids while the hubby stays gone all the time is beyond me. How did women find joy in life? Seriously, when I think of being a mom in the 1950's when it was common to have 4,5, or even more kids I am flabbergasted. They had to deal with babies and toddlers BEFORE all these wonderful modern novelties. They didn't' have everything right at their fingertips. If I need to warm a bottle I stick it in the microwave and WALA! I have a warm bottle in 30 seconds. If the baby has a dirty diaper, I take it off of her and throw it away, her new diaper will keep her clean and happy until it's time to throw it away. If she seems gassy, I give her Mylicon and WALA! She is no longer gassy. If she cries too much, I give her gripe water and WALA! She is calm. If she spits up too much when she is laid on her back I buy a fancy crib wedge and WALA! She is inclined. If my soon to be three year old won't sleep I "Google it" to find a solution. If I feel sad and lonely and like I am the only woman in the world going through this, I go to babycenter.com and immediately feel better after "chatting" with other moms going through the EXACT same thing! The list goes on and on. Being a mother is hard (in my opinion)but being a mother before "modern" times must have been TORTURE!!!! So my hat is off to all you wonderful and amazing women who paved the road for my own trip through motherhood.
I would continue with my ponderings but my bundle of work just started fussing so I will go feed her, burp her, change her, and then take little man to school for the day. I will then go to the grocery store for formula, diapers, bottle liners, etc. After her NEXT bottle I will start her laundry and finish Jackson's from yesterday. Later I have to sit down to pay all the medical bills from her birth that I have been putting off and I then I have to call my OB about permanent birth control. Hopefully I will find time to blog a bit more but I wouldn't count it;) Until next time...